English Language At Its Best - 1

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An employee applied for leave as follows.
"Since I have to go to my village to sell my land along with my wife, please give me one-week leave."


A Job application from a non-english speaking country.
"This has reference to your advertisement calling for a ' Typist and an Accountant - Male or Female'... As I am both(!!? )for the past several years and I can handle both with good experience, I am applying for the post."


Another great man.
"Dear Sir: with reference to the above, please refer to my below..." 


Laundry, India.
"Lady's, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time."

Funny English Tourist Board

Hotel, Moscow (opposite Russian Orthodox monastery).
"You are welcome to visit cemetery where famous russian and soviet composer, artist and writers are buried daily except Thrusday."


From H.A.L. Administration Dept.
"As my mother-in-law has expired and I am only one responsible for it, please grant me 10 days leave."


Hotel, India.
"Women's are requested not to have childrens in bar."


An extraordinary leave letter.
"I am suffering from fever, please declare one-day holiday."


Letter written for application of leave.
"My wife is suffering from sickness and as I am her only husband at home I may be granted leave".


Letter writing.
"I am well here and hope you are also in the same well."


Best Covering note.
"I am enclosed herewith..."


Restaurant, India.
Open seven days a week, And weekends too.


Restaurant menu, Germany.
Our food leaves you nothing to hope for.


Tribute to the Professors.
* Open the doors of the window. Let the Air Force come in.

* Shhh...Quiet, boys...the principal just passed away in the corridor.

* shhh... quite, the principal is rotating in the school.



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